. a quick escape


I’ve heard many times over that “the hardest place to escape is your mind.”  Well, no offense to the person that first coined that phrase, but they must have not had a toddler or small child running around because they are absolutely impossible to escape!  Sometimes it is actually our mind that we can fold into for that much needed few minutes of escape from our chaotic and stress filled lives.  Sometimes, it’s all we can do.

I have found in my life as a SN parent that having an “escape plan” during the day is one thing that keeps me stable & sane after picking up smeared PB&J off the floor for the fourth time today & being startled because my seemingly innocent child shrieks “GO TO GUPPY’S HOUSE” right into my ear so I am deaf for the next 10 minutes or she refuses to poop in the potty but comes to let me know she’s “pooped” as she grabs the back of her pull-up.  An escape plan.. yes, every SN parent NEEDS one!  It’s like a tornado drill or a fire drill, you need a plan in place and to have practiced it at regular intervals to be able to just blindly take action when the time is needed & the alarms are going off. You know the alarms I’m talking about.. when your child slaps you for the 12th time in a day & all you want to do is slap the little sucker back or when you go to the bathroom for that 5 min of “me time” and somehow the same little sucker gets out of her locked “safe space” and you see little fingers and toes under the door and a “MOMMMMMYYYYY/DADDDYYY” from the other side.  Alarms like having to breathe through an anger episode because you’re already exhausted and don’t want to listen to Mickey Mouse or Moana or Frozen anymore and you’ve already switched between the 22 times within the hour.  Everyone has different “alarms” that go off in their head when they need to deploy their “escape plan” and I figured I’d share a few of mine with you (yes, it’s always a good idea to have multiple because its inevitable that one will fail you a time or two..)

                                                                             My Escape Plans                                                                               (in no particular order)

    • Alcohol: Now I’m not talking about getting drunk, or even tipsy.. but sometimes a glass of wine or a mixed drink or beer can seriously calm your nerves.  You can pour it in a glass, close your eyes (standing up of course because little humans LOVE to crawl all over you JUST as you sit down to “relax”) and pretend that you’re somewhere far off .. like a beach or mountain top or Channing Tatum’s bedroom.. um.. ya know, whatever works for you!  Sip it if you can or gulp that bitch down and keep on a goin my friend.  Either way, it lets you feel human and grown for a minute.  I’m sucking down a Malibu & Sprite as I type this out.. no judgements people
    • Music: I’ll share my “escape zone” playlist in a bit (it’s quite lengthy actually) – put in those ear buds and jam out.  You can even keep one ear bud out so you can hear your kiddo “need you” and respond accordingly.  Today our little human was actually sharing my ear buds.. I had one in & she had one in.. (she’s obviously a fan of old school 2000’s music like “whatever you like” by T.I.!!)
    • Favorite TV show or movie: Sometimes this one is just not possible amidst all the chaos and toddler TV shows that seem to ALWAYS be on, but on the random occasional day you are able to sit down a catch an episode of Grey’s or Rise then those can be considered part of one’s “escape plan” – remember the earlier sentiment that you need more than 1 escape plan because they will not all work on a given day. I have found that the more “outside of yourself” a show or movie takes you, the better. ‘The Day After Tomorrow’ never fails in this category, even if it is 100+ degrees outside, after watching this movie, I seriously feel cold and expect to look out the window to find snow drifts!  That is the kind of “outside of yourself” experience I am talking about.  For some it’s a talk show, for others it’s the new hip something or other, for me it’s Gilmore Girls, One Tree Hill, or Grey’s.  Movie wise it’s Pretty Woman, Far & Away, and A League of Their Own.  Search through your mind and figure out what yours is! Trust me.. It just may save your life (emotional and mental) one day.
    • Books/Audio Books: This one is my absolute favorite.  I can get lost in a book better than anyone & those are the best “escape” plans ever!  You get to immerse yourself in someone else’s life for a few minutes, you can become someone else, you can befriend someone else, your troubles suddenly don’t seem so much when Victoria finds Leo cheating on her with her best friend just as she walks in the house with dinner, so sure that he is going to propose that very night!  (c’mon, you know slutty novels are the BEST..) The KINDLE AUDIBLE is fantastic because you can listen to it just as you would music, amist the chaos that is our every day life.. you can find out just what Victoria chooses to do about her backstabbing best friend & boyfriend while your kids take a bath or throw paper airplanes at each other! Now, that’s my kind of reading.. AND.. if you need a “back up” escape plan, go ahead and read aloud to your SN kids.. (like Tom Selleck says in “Three Men & a Baby”.. she doesn’t understand what I’m saying anyway, it’s the tone of voice that you use” – oh Tom, how we love you.
    • I’m usually a paperback kinda woman, but with my KINDLE ULIMITED membership, I’ve gone digital!  All my books on multiple devices plus a RIDICULOUS library of FREE books to choose from.  All 4 of my favorite books have been on the Kindle Unlimited Site at least once since I’ve had it (about a year)

My most favorite books of all time, I’ve read each at least a dozen times

Make sure you download the FREE KINDLE APP on all of your devices so you can ready anytime & anywhere your heart desires!

There you have it my friends.. my personal “escape plans”, practiced and ready to go!

As promised – here is my Escape Zone Playlist (again, in no particular order)

  • Just Like Fire: Pink
  • So What: Pink
  • I am Here: Pink
  • Glitter in the Air: Pink
  • Dark Horse: Katy Perry
  • All Kinds of Kinds: Miranda Lambert
  • Thrive: Casting Crowns
  • Seasons of Love: RENT
  • Never Enough: Greatest Showman
  • This Is Me: Greatest Showman
  • Break Your Bones: Colonial Blue
  • Dear Misery: Colonial Blue
  • Not Ready to Make Nice: Dixie Chicks
  • Landslide: Dixie Chicks
  • Meant to Be: Florida Georgia Line
  • Music is Healing: Florida Georgia Line
  • I’ll Fly Away: Johnny Cash
  • I’m Shipping up to Boston: Dropkick Murphys
  • Galway Girl: Marys Lane
  • Overcomer: Mandisa
  • Bleed the Same: Mandisa
  • Whatever you Like: T.I.
  • Parachute: Chris Stapleton
  • Traveler: Chris Stapelton
  • Timber: Pitbull
  • We Can’t Stop: Miley Cyrus
  • 23: Miley Cyrus
  • Low: Flo Rida
  • Yea: Usher
  • Dirt Road Anthem: Jason Aldean
  • Forever Country: Various Artists
  • Mama Who Bore Me: RISE soundtrack
  • Glorious: RISE soundtrack
  • Country Grammar
  • Ghetto Cowboy
  • Rocky Racoon: Beatles
  • Sound of Silence: Simon & Garfunkle (I have always enjoyed the original version the best)

-The End

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